My goal this year is to complete a person doll.

2017 was the year of learning Amigurumi and learning to make bears. I made a Peppa Pig lovey. I learned I can follow a pattern and also make it my own.

I started but did not finish several “people” dolls. I have a lot of books on knitting & crocheting dolls (AmigurMe, Knit your own Boyfriend, The Complete Idiots Guide to Amigurumi, Edward’s Crochet Doll Emporium, Arne & Carlos’s Knitted Dolls)

So this year is about pushing through. I feel driven to make these dolls but also afraid.

I’m kind of funny, choosing as my goal something I can actually accomplish this week!

——later————

Oka so I’ve also posted my mermaid doll fantasies and Kale asked me how much to buy? So sweet (and inspiring) but I explained I’m mot there yet.

I’m showing a decided disinclination to do anything at all today!

But I think the solution is to take the dogs to Alameda, walk them there, and then go get my sudafed and kombucha & yogurt. Tht’as all I need to get by.

No structure + no luz = very sad catriona

much later: Crystal asked if anyone broke off contact with blood family:

I did, about 25 years ago (wow, time flies). It was after I came out and my sister wrote me a letter saying she felt I was being selfish and disrespectful of the family and that I was the cause of all of the family problems. I shared the letter with my mom, and she didn't respond the way I wanted her to, so I got really upset and cut off all communication with them. This went on for several months, maybe as many as six months. Then my mom told me she was coming to see me (an eight hour drive) and wanted to talk with me. She made the journey because she loved me and cared about me and wanted me to know that my family was the place for me: they would stretch and grow to accommodate who I am and might be.

I know not everyone' stories have a happy ending and I'm not saying everything was always perfect afterward, or that my sister and I are all Elsa and Anna now. At the time, I felt like it was important for me. But I also felt like the white queer community I was in didn't really value family connections. I don't know if this makes sense.

This isn't the same as the just toxic members of my family, some of whom I just avoided forever and some I had to work around.

(I decided that posting this was kind of self-serving, since she’s got toxic people to deal with and has already moved on from her question.